


You are never waking up from Spooky Mormon Hell Dream

by Phantom_Valheru



Category: The Book of Mormon - Parker/Stone/Lopez
Genre: I've seen this musical too many times, M/M, There is no such thing, just kidding, mcpriceley, this is my first time please be nice
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-07
Updated: 2020-02-07
Packaged: 2021-02-28 04:15:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,343
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22597681
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Phantom_Valheru/pseuds/Phantom_Valheru
Summary: There was sort of an inevitability to the fate of Elder McKinley.His whole life he’d squashed down a part of him, choked on feelings he wasn’t supposed to have, pretended to like the girls so his parents wouldn’t get suspicious. But now Elder McKinley was gone, and Connor could pursue all of those feelings he’d been holding inside for an eternity.He thought he’d start with Kevin Price.(set after the musical ends)
Relationships: Elder "Connor" McKinley/Kevin Price
Comments: 2
Kudos: 53





	You are never waking up from Spooky Mormon Hell Dream

**Author's Note:**

> This one is for my sister. Who has been to every Australian production of BoM with me. Who went on a backstage tour of the show with me today because we just cannot get enough of these boys. Who did an awesome beta job. Who inspires me to write. Who is basically the best sister and friend a girl could have.

There was sort of an inevitability to the fate of Elder McKinley. He lay on his hard, narrow cot in the stifling African heat and knew that he’d always been destined here. Not necessarily by these means. The means were a little bit bizarre. But the end result had been certain since his first spooky hell dream, directly after he’d dreamed about Steve Blade. The spooky hell dreams had never really stopped since that moment, tormenting his sleep and wakeful daydreams, and slowly over time he’d realised that he was never going to paradise in the latter days. That those gay thoughts, that he tried so hard to crush into a ball, were never going away. And thanks to the actions of a near stranger, everyone else was going to know it too.

Elder McKinley – no, just Connor now – felt a strange sort of calm steal over him. He wasn’t going to paradise. And that was okay. He thought he’d feel worse; panicky or lost or confused. But he wasn’t any of those things. He was relieved. Now he could stop pretending. His whole life he’d squashed down a part of him, choked on feelings he wasn’t supposed to have, pretended to like the girls so his parents wouldn’t get suspicious. But now Elder McKinley was gone, and Connor – who apparently was now a devotee of the Arnold faith – could pursue all of those feelings he’d been holding inside for an eternity.

He thought he’d start with Kevin Price. 

He swung his legs out of bed. It was still early and the other boys were all in varying degrees of panic over their sudden expulsion from the Mormon faith. Elder Thomas… no, just Chris now. That was going to take some time to get used to. Chris, his mission companion, was wrapped up in his blanket, the Book of Mormon clutched in both of his hands like a life raft. Like he was drowning. 

Connor felt a stab of doubt. Were they doing the right thing? They could go back to the United States, atone, beg forgiveness from their parents and maybe get back everything they’d lost. It wasn’t too late. Not for the others, at any rate. Connor doubted Arnold would leave, not with a woman like Nabulungi waiting for him. Kevin would stay, that much was certain. His blasphemous nosedive into heresy was almost complete. But for the others, there was still hope.

Connor stood up and left the cramped room, leaving Chris to his own crisis. He figured they all had to make their own decisions, he couldn’t do it for them, and for once he ignored the voice in his brain telling him that their welfare was his responsibility. For just once, for one evening, he was going to focus on himself. In the main living quarters, Jacob sat close to his mission companion, both of them talking quietly in the dim space. Connor moved past them, catching the words ‘dick belt’ as he did. It made him smile, and the sudden guilt that assaulted him was so ingrained that he almost felt it as a physical blow. But then he remembered that he wasn’t a Mormon anymore, and if he found the thought of grown men strapping enormous dicks to their waists hilarious, it was okay. 

Connor swallowed hard as he left their crude quarters, allowing himself to think for the first time how much he hated it here. The walls were thin in their tiny cottage, and he’d heard Kevin claim he’d been ripped off on their first night here. Connor had felt the same way, but he’d never said the words out loud. And the part of himself that he never acknowledged actually existed had told him his posting here was punishment for his lifetime of lustful thoughts towards other men. 

He found Kevin by the dry stream bed that ran at the bottom of the gully near their camp. It had been full of water when he’d arrived, and he’d spent more than a few afternoons pretending to snooze on the bank while covertly watching the others bathe. The hell dreams on those days were particularly nightmarish, but like any addict, knowing the downside was never enough to stop him from doing it again. Kevin was watching the sunset, calmly, his brow creased in thought. Or worry? Connor couldn’t tell. He couldn’t imagine what a man in Kevin’s position might be thinking, or how he managed to sit down after such a crude extraction from his rectum. 

Connor settled himself down next to the other man, and when Kevin spoke, his eyes were staring out into the growing darkness, “I always thought I’d do something incredible. But I never thought I’d bring down an entire mission and ruin all of your lives.”

“Having doubts?” Connor asked, happy to focus on Kevin so he wouldn’t have to confront his own fears, “What happened to not caring if we break the rules?”

Connor watched a smile creep over Kevin’s face, “Oh, I still don’t care about that.” His head turned and his eyes shone brightly in the last of the sunlight, “But I do care about what will happen to all of you.”

Connor licked his lips and swallowed hard, “We’ll be okay. We’ve got each other, right?”

Kevin nodded, and allowed his head to fall back against the dusty soil, staring up into the sky, “I’m not going anywhere.”

“Good.” Connor spoke maybe a little too fast, turning on the spot to face Kevin, using the movement to hide the fact that he’d moved a few centre meters closer. “This place will be a little more bearable with you in it.”

He couldn’t help but grin as Kevin’s smile deepened, creasing his eyes and lighting up the small space between them with warmth, 

“I was thinking,” Kevin mused slowly as the last ray of sunshine winked out, “That we still need some rules. We don’t want everyone going crazy with their newfound freedom.”

“Yes.” Connor agreed, falling easily back into his role as District Leader. He’d been in charge for three months, and before then his companions at the Missionary Training Centre had always looked up to him. He knew the value of rules, “Like keeping your windows shut, no matter what.”

“And curfew. There are more than just mosquitos out there that want to gobble you up at night.”

“But not lights out. Otherwise, how will I gobble you up?” Connor hadn’t meant to say it out loud. His hands clasped over his mouth in shock at his audacity. What sort of monster was he turning in to? “That is, uh, I mean...” he stumbled over his words, feeling his face burn brightly with his blush. He was glad it was dark.

Kevin’s laugh was like music. Hearty and deep, and Connor would have appreciated it if it hadn’t of been at his expense. He wanted the earth to swallow him up, “Sorry.” He spoke quietly, “I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable. I just thought... since you said... I thought maybe you felt the same way.”

“I do.” Kevin turned his head towards Connor, his eyes still sparkling with laughter, “I just didn’t expect it to happen so suddenly. Or delivered so perfectly.” He sat up, swinging himself around to face Connor, crossing his legs, “I’ve wanted to kiss you since you lead Cunningham and I to our room. And you were in my hell dream, you know. You look really good in a feather boa.”

Connor couldn’t breathe. Their knees were touching above the hard, unrelenting African soil and Connor McKinley was actually speaking out loud with another man about wanting to kiss him. He wasn’t sure he was even still alive. Surely a lifetime of sinful thoughts couldn’t lead to this. And then he remembered he was going to hell anyway. And that was okay. And he was going to go there in the arms of Kevin Price. 

That night, for the first time since he was ten, Connor McKinley slept peacefully.


End file.
